Comments on: How Being Raised By A Narcissist Can Make You Feel You’ve Been Neglected Your Whole Life

By: Jonice

Jonice — Wed, 12 Feb 2020 22:09:33 +0000

In reply to RR. Dear RR, yes it does often matter, depending on your relationship with the person. The best way to understand the nature of a person in your life is to talk it over with a trained therapist.

By: RR

RR — Tue, 11 Feb 2020 23:24:57 +0000

Hi Dr Webb, thank you for your work, it is so eye-opening and validating!
I don’t remember reading anything in your books regarding differentiating a narcissist type from someone with high-functioning and undiagnosed autism, which would have some similar traits (self-focused, lacking capacity for empathy and so on).
What do you think about this? How would you tell the difference? And does it matter?

By: Jackie

Jackie — Mon, 14 Jan 2019 02:35:07 +0000

All I can really say is – thank you. Your posts and books etc. mean a lot to me, my wife, my kids, and so many other people. You have an incredible gift for articulating these very confusing and emotional concepts in such beautifully simply ways. This makes it manageable and possible to first believe what is going on and then to heal from it. Thank you.

By: Jonice

Jonice — Sun, 13 Jan 2019 20:52:47 +0000

In reply to Beverly. Dear Beverly, your story touches my heart. I am so glad to be part of your honoring yourself and your emotions more. Good for you for doing this work. Keep it up! You deserve the calmness and control that you are working so hard for, and much much more.

By: Beverly

Beverly — Sun, 13 Jan 2019 18:00:38 +0000

I have been reading both of your books and I see myself all over the pages of your books. I definitely do have CEN. My mother was a narcissist and only cared when she thought my actions made her look bad. Now I am married to a narcissist. Most of my life I felt alone, neglected, abused physically, mentally and emotionally. Lately I just want to cry. Not sure how to deal with all the emotions I have been having. I have been writing to try to get my feelings out on paper. I do have a therapist and she has been helping me to acknowledge how I feel and accept them. I do feel more in control and more calm than I have ever been in my life. I want to thank you for your books and all the insights you have given me about myself.

Bev

By: JP

JP — Sun, 23 Dec 2018 16:42:32 +0000

In reply to Laura. I would also take every opportunity to let the child know how smart, talented, special, gifted the child is. The only positive comments about my ability I received growing up came from my teachers which helped me believe in my ability to go to college and join the professional world when so many around me choose to work as dancers in gentlemen clubs or marry the first man who offered to take care of them.

By: Jonice

Jonice — Thu, 20 Dec 2018 21:27:51 +0000

In reply to Katie. Good for you Katie! Keep up the wonderful work you're doing.

By: Katie

Katie — Tue, 18 Dec 2018 15:29:18 +0000

Running on Empty and your articles have been so enlightening for me. My parents were abusive to us and each other. Yet nobody saw it because in public they gave the appearance of a “perfect family “ and expected us to act accordingly. Everything was a facade. Unraveling this and learning to parent differently has been essential and exhausting. The hardest part is the attachment feelings to a mother figure I still long for. But it also makes me acutely attuned to my kids needing that safety and love consistently. Hopefully breaking the cycle!

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Mon, 17 Dec 2018 10:15:39 +0000

Thank you Jonice. This is it right here. This is the reason I’m so messed up. This is also the reason I’ve chosen every screwed up partner that never loved me & why I wasted years in those relationships no ever being heard or acknowledged. This is why all those relationships, as well as my marriage have failed. This is the reason I AM a COMPLETE failure. This is the reason for it ALL. At this point of my life, (I’m in my early 50’s)
I can’t even maintain staying employed. Please don’t ask me to read your books. I’d love to more than anything but, I’m such a loser, that I can’t even afford to get myself well. My life has been nothing but pain & misery. I so wish I had been strong enough to have your will power. Right now I don’t even want to be here anymore. There’s nothing left for me. I know you’re going to say I should seek professional help & I thank you for your concern but, I’ve already done so throughout my life & as you can see its done nothing for me. I truly appreciate
you for giving me such an informative & eye opening education as to why I’m so screwed up as it’s been way better to read your posts & gain that knowledge than seeing any professional who could never provide me any answers… I went no contact with my mother years back to bad it wasn’t sooner. My adult son hasn’t spoken to me for three years. Since his father passed away. Things were good between us or at least I thought they were but, I guess his father’s narcissism was my fault too. I did everything differently with my son and broke the cycle of neglect & abuse I grew up with but, it just goes to show that obviously it wasn’t enough. I give up. I wish everyone well & I hope they find the healing path I’ve always been in search of.
Thank you again.

By: MPA

MPA — Tue, 11 Dec 2018 19:44:22 +0000

I ‘m 70 and still struggle with this. Thanks to new resources, like ROE, at least I know WHY now. I can see that patterns I set up. I don’t express my wants and needs, then feel neglected when I don’t get them fulfilled. It’s hard to believe that it’s now safe to ask for help and to express feelings of anger, disappointment, etc.