Comments on: My Dear Black Sheep, 3 Things You Must Know

By: Drew

Drew — Thu, 16 Feb 2023 02:46:02 +0000

I really needed this article. My familial black sheep status has been hitting hard lately which has prompted me to search for answers. I found this article and I am now reading your first book. I am finding soooo many answers to many of the questions I’ve had about my family dynamics in adulthood and how we got here. Thank you!

By: Jonice

Jonice — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 21:22:48 +0000

In reply to Shelly Jo. I'm not familiar with it, I'm sorry.

By: Jonice

Jonice — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 21:22:06 +0000

That’s excellent, Rodney! That was my goal for readers when I wrote the article.

By: Jonice

Jonice — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 21:18:03 +0000

In reply to Gigi. Dear Gigi, I am so very sorry for all you have endured. Please, please call a therapist on the CEN Therapist List and set up an appointment.

By: Jonice

Jonice — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 21:15:23 +0000

In reply to Jean. Dear Jean, that sounds very hurtful. Please see a CEN therapist to work through your natural and understandable feelings about this!

By: Jonice

Jonice — Tue, 04 Feb 2020 16:39:27 +0000

In reply to Muna. It's not too late, Muna! You can do it.

By: Shelly Jo

Shelly Jo — Mon, 03 Feb 2020 22:49:46 +0000

What do you think of the enneagram personality test and profiles?

By: Gigi

Gigi — Mon, 03 Feb 2020 14:54:00 +0000

For years I went to counseling. I had sexual abuse, physical and verbal by family until I left the home at 17. I never spoke a word about it due to how powerless I was in the home. I knew at 3 years old my parents were not going to protect me. Nothing hurt me worse than knowing I had no value to those who where suppose to be immediate family. Counselors always focused on the acts done to me and i remember thinking I must be crazy because the acts were bad but nothing hurt worse than knowing if I was to talk about things being done to me I wouldn’t be believed and would probably endure more pain for speaking out. At 40 i couldnt take anymore abuses.. left a diagnosed narc that I was married to for 10 years and vowed to not tolerate any abuse around me. It was healthy. I told my parents about everything that happened to me in their home, some of it they knew about because they were the violators. But the overall feeling I got was I was now a threat to their fake existence. I cut all contact at Christmas. They now are focused on degrading me to my children in the most cunning ways. I have only told one child about what happened to me… my parents spoke to this child thinking they could belittle me to him. He called them out ..ultimitly asking if they ever loved me. I know my parents were shocked because if manipulation doesnt get worse I had made a deal with them to move forward and keep issues between parents and myself, because I had more empathy for them than love for myself. They never said no deal like this needed..we dont want to brush your past under the rug to spare us..you have suffered enough…they loved the idea that I would sell myself out to protect them. I could use more info on how to explain to my kids the depth of pain inflicted on me. My parents want to play me off as oversensitive and them the innocent bystanders. My siblings all tolerate my parents..so by not going along I’m the black sheep. How do you handle children who also see you as the blacksheep..the disparate treatment is obvious among my siblings..my children see it..and they as also are substandard compared to their cousins in the eyes of their grandparents.

By: Jean

Jean — Mon, 03 Feb 2020 13:18:25 +0000

I have been given a quarter out of my late mothers estate,my sister gets half and the other quarter goes to my ex husband. It hurts so much why I dont understand.

By: Muna

Muna — Mon, 03 Feb 2020 00:25:50 +0000

Oh Jonice.. I’ve found you recently and I relate so much to what you are writing about.. I was emotionally neglected, yes. And it was not subtle at all.. My mom passed away when I was 7. I lived with my dad and his wife for a short while but then moved to my grandparents house where my paternal uncles and aunts lived.. I was trained to do housework beginning of my teenage years, and learned they are key to earn acceptance.. Very rarely did I receive feedback on my good hard work. I waited for feedback often I thought I did something wrong though I had done what I’m supposed to do.. Bereaved also from the usual fun teenagers have due to poor social environment around.. Those memories are ineffaceable. Grew up to search for love in all wrong places and now hope it’s not too late to heal. I’ve got your book recently and will start reading it soon.. Thank you