While the issue of “communist” Russia is avoidant, as politicization is, having known quite a number of Russians, Ukrainians, Moldovans and others , I have NOT found the intrinsic culture to seem highly neglectful of offspring.
From the highly inclusive and loving traditional native Siberians to the successful artists and scientists, to the refugees (and make NO mistake – there ARE refugees from the USA across the world. The issue is far more significant and complex than those who refuse to explore may be aware. See Philip Tetlock’s discussion of Isaiah Berlin’s The Hedgehog and The Fox, wherein Hedgehogs are described as “knowing one big thing” and exteriorizing error (Blame!), while a foxlike thinker realizes the extreme complexity of causation.

We find repeatedly the former misattribution of Dr. Webb’s work in comments. I abandoned psychology for more honest animals and their cognitions precisely due to aggressive, dogmatic, and violent human misattributors.
Needless to say neither form of avoidance, mine or those who choose to deny and attack, are appropriate methods of healing.

A someone who deeply desires that not a single person falls into the dogmatic/denial error, I respond here. not to initiate ANY debate, but ONLY so that those who personally suffer from lack and want to enlarge their love and compassion are not sidetracked by aggressive rejection and denial of their beauty and validity, however attractive rage and blame may seem.

I wonder how much CEN the people in communist Russia experienced.

The therapist I am with now has been seeing me for a little over two years. She is much younger and I thought she would not be able to help me much because of her inexperience. Instead she is helping me. I think it is because she has an education that includes the new things that psychologists have learned. At the moment she does DBT therapy with me but she is going to incorporate some sort of trauma based therapy with me next week. I was assessed recently with ddnos so those things will be addressed.

My actual comment is that I tell my therapist that I do not feel like I have had trauma or abuse because I compare myself with people who have been physically or sexually abused. Reading what you wrote, “It’s a “non-event” which is unnoticeable and unmemorable…” is exactly what I needed to see in order to really feel validated. My therapist tried to validate me but what she said did not help. Your words have.

I’m going to get your book and try to read it. I struggle with my concentration. Maybe she will want to read it as well. She also talks to me about my attachment style being “anxious-avoidant” and that has helped me see a pattern in my relationships. It is nice to understand why I think, feel, and act the way I do. I don’t just feel like I am a defective loser. I still feel like a loser though.

I could go on about the intense attachments I have had in my life, especially with my therapists, but Dr Webb, you probably already guessed that.

Thank you for the opportunity to learn more about myself, the opportunity to share my experiences, and the opportunity to read what others think.

I don’t have any friends out of Choice. Apart from my children every other relationship has failed. With something missing inside of us its hard to relate to others. I find myself looking at others and its a mystery. I like my own company. How are you today?

My son has ADHD and your right without medication relationships would fall apart. But he doesn’t suffer emotional neglect. As his mother I suffered but made sure brought him up completely opposite to my upbringing. He’s content in his life and always has my support. Hope u have a. Contented life

You obviously do not suffer. This book is spot on and helpful to me and others who struggle just to exist. The parents usually have emotional neglect too. But our generation are looking for answers so that we can mend ourselves.