I agree that therapy is not about the therapist’s feelings, but their ability to empathize with you depends upon their knowledge and feelings and their access to those parts of themselves. If they feel upset by something that happened between you, perhaps they are not able to get in touch with that knowledge and feelings.
I’m not sure whether you have terminated with that therapist, but it might be helpful for you to practice repairing your relationship with the therapist. It might require you to apologize if it is truly an error on your part. Practicing relationship skills with a therapist is beneficial if you feel like you can say what you need to say. I’m actually in the middle of some of these situations and practicing!

Well, that’s another story….my therapist of 2 1/2 years told me I had hurt her feelings…..she never said how, but I no longer felt I could trust her or be honest with her.
Therapy is all about honesty, right ???
I told her I thought my therapy was not about her feelings.

But hope is not a strategy, Vanessa. It will probably not go away on its own. It’s important to take on this problem yourself and try to solve it. Please find a good therapist to guide you. I’m sure you are missing some good opportunities in life to learn and grow because of this shame and sensitivity to criticism.

Dear Binky, please find a good therapist to share all this with. You are carrying far too much burden, and there are people available who can help you work through it and see things, and yourself, in a different way. You deserve better.

It’s so true! You do need both internal and external care in order to heal well. The external care can come from a family member, a friend, your spouse, your community or a therapist. There are limitless options for external care and the most important thing is to be open to accepting it.