Comments on: Why Legions of People Wonder: Do You Feel Like I Do?

By: Jonice

Jonice — Mon, 07 Oct 2019 02:48:27 +0000

In reply to Chloe. Thank you, Chloe. Clearly, you see what I see.

By: Chloe

Chloe — Sun, 06 Oct 2019 09:08:05 +0000

I have yet to meet someone who can honestly say “no, I do not feel like this.” Every person I know has experienced childhood emotional neglect as did their parents and on and on backward through time. Most people have no idea their depression, anxiety, pain – to name just a few -stem from this. Sure, plenty of people put up a facade of happiness – fun, travel, parties, perfectly edited social media photos – all in an effort to avoid the emptiness they truly feel. I love the last line of this article “I will not hide anymore.” The more people who begin acknowledging the neglect and start showing up for themselves and for their children, the “legions” will decrease. What wonderful information you provide to facilitate this!

By: JeanAnn

JeanAnn — Fri, 16 Nov 2018 18:01:31 +0000

In reply to Professor Maxine L. Lawson. I can relate, Dr. Lawson! I'm 53 and have a track record of failed relationships behind me, and the pattern is clear in hindsight. I did just what you're describing: I was drawn to the type of man who would not treat me well. In some cases, it was downright abusive. Yet, there were always kind and honest men who were available and interested in knowing me, in caring about me. But nope, I continued to break their hearts and end up with selfish a-holes. As a result, I am single by choice these days, lonely often. But I am learning to hope that I will figure out how to have some type of intimate relationship eventually. I don't want to hurt anyone like that again, for one thing. I also want to allow myself to experience this thing people refer to as "love". :) We are not horrible people, only confused about our own value.

By: JeanAnn

JeanAnn — Fri, 16 Nov 2018 17:51:30 +0000

In reply to Lisa. I often question whether I am being "paranoid"; I certainly feel self-conscious at public events! If we are mindful of the feeling, though, I don't believe it can turn into true paranoia. As a result of awareness as well as honest sharing, we avoid delusional thinking like that. :)

By: Jonice

Jonice — Thu, 15 Nov 2018 20:59:57 +0000

In reply to Leticia. Hi Leticia, this blog is full of examples like that. Just keep reading and you'll find many.

By: Leticia

Leticia — Thu, 15 Nov 2018 17:39:54 +0000

Could you give an example of how one ignores one’s feelings and emotions and how one should respond to them?

By: MR

MR — Tue, 13 Nov 2018 07:59:37 +0000

One of the strangest things I experienced was in high school. There had been a car crash the weekend before. Three students had died. One of them was in my class. When I got to school, classes were not running. Students were huddled in groups crying and hugging. I was even out of place with my one best friend and her group. I didn’t know what to do or how to be. The bell rang, which everyone ignored but I walked to class. The teacher was sitting there alone, crying and said, “sorry there is no class today.” That experience was when I knew that I didn’t have access to an entire range of emotions that others did. I knew it was right to be sad and it was not ok that students had died but I had no idea how to just be with those feelings. By that time, I was already well know for not being a hugger or cryer. I was a good student but couldn’t have a proper boyfriend or trust enough to do so. My life was me and some people I was acquainted with and pets. That’s how it has been ever since. Note: I wondered if others with CEN have avoided all weddings, births, funerals and most social events for decades. I avoid all events with emotion extremes and hugging! 🙂

By: Joy Ryan

Joy Ryan — Mon, 12 Nov 2018 16:11:28 +0000

Thanks Janice Found this Helpful signed up for your free videos and found this article helpful. Yes I have felt on the outside and wanting a place to belong so I echo what you said there. I read your article on parents with CEN and I think it’s true it generational. Looking to get up with a local therapist as per your email who as done one or more of your CEN training. Thanks for your sharing research and input. So helpful.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Mon, 12 Nov 2018 10:05:53 +0000

Sometimes I feel like I am doing so well and then I go to a public event and suddenly feel so out of place and conspicuous and like people can see I shouldn’t be there. Is that not paranoia? Could it be both?

By: Danielle

Danielle — Mon, 12 Nov 2018 04:52:03 +0000

This has been the hardest aspect for me: always feeling like I’m on the outside looking in. This leads me to striving, and now finally acknowledging and realizing this is my tendency (people pleasing at its best) makes me accept myself more and feel much more comfortable in social situations. I’ve striven towards perfection in the hope of being ‘in’ but now I see I’m in with myself – and that’s the best!
Since I’ve realized this aspect of myself, I’m amazed at how relaxed I am. The fact that I can accept myself fully, flaws and all, and even in seemingly highly stressful situations – it’s a worldview shift for me.